I often teach that to find where the G-spot is in a woman, and how it might feel, you can simply put your thumb in your mouth and feel the rougher, ridged area just beyond your teeth, on the top part of your mouth. Beyond that ridged area is the upper palate and halfway between the ridges and the upper palate is the area that is analogous to the G-spot. I find it fascinating that the interior of the mouth seems so close in structure to the yoni (vagina in Sanskrit) and the G-spot area.

The upper palate area is filled with nerve endings. Try putting your little vibrator up there sometime and see how it feels! It’s kind of intense. Obviously suckling and eating creates the evolutionary nerve aspects of the sensitivity of the mouth.

The erotic feeling of sucking, whether it be a lollipop, water bottle or beer or some aspect of the anatomy like a nipple, thumb or lingam (phallus in Sanskrit), was developed during infancy to not only create a sensory experience while eating but to provide intimacy training for the child and mother (or primary care giver). Both the mother and the child produce the ‘bonding’ neuro-hormone Oxytocin during nursing. The accompanying eye gazing that occurs between mother and child trains the baby to seek the intimacy of faces, and specifically the eyes, as it grows older. Interestingly, Oxytocin is also produced during orgasm.

The upper palate is also the area you place your tongue during advanced breath, energy and meditation work. The tip of the tongue points straight to the fontanel at the top of the head (the ’soft’ spot) and is reputed to open up the nadis or energy channels in the body. When a person has a Kundalini * energy experience there have been reports of an ambrosia like nectar of immortality — Amrita (Sanskrit) — that drips precious drops from the back of the throat. Experiencing female ejaculation, also called Amrita by many Western Tantricas, is associated with G-spot stimulation. It has been noticed by many Western practitioners that a marked difference in age appearance of skin quality and facial vibrancy is also associated with female ejaculation. Well, I’ll take any kind of Amrita I can get.

So, there seems to be the potential of a G-spot in the vagina and one in the mouth, too. During Tantric sex certain positions have the ability to facilitate the movement of energy upwards. If both the upper palate, with the tongue applying pressure, and the G-spot, with the lingam applying pressure, are activated during sex, an aligned channel is opened up to activate all of the body. This is a tool that can be used to align and open up the chakra channels for Kundalini energy to flow. This same effect can be discovered and utilized by connecting the tongue to the roof of the mouth, sitting in an up-right, meditative pose and doing PC muscle (Kegels) exercises while visualizing the energy movement. This is the simpler way to play with the effects of this practice before you take it into the sexual arena.

I discovered this dual connection between the mouth and the yoni quite a few years back and have never heard anyone else refer to it before. I love oral sex and had wondered why that might be so. Yes, I love to eat, so that is a part of it — OK, I’m oral! I have also noticed that during oral sex it’s the slow out-stroke that always gets me. It’s the same with intercourse. The long, slow out-stroke is the one that triggers orgasm for me. So what is it about these two very similar areas of the body? Why are they so similar in construction and what might that mean for our pleasure and our ability to build and expand erotic energy?

I would love to have feedback from anyone who has experienced orgasm through mouth contact or who recognizes the connection of both G-spot orgasms and erotic stimuli in the mouth, too. Oh, and could you please let me know what you think about these Sanskrit words like lingam and yoni (vagina is such a ‘hard’ sounding word) — do you like this or do they just get in the way?

* Various interpretations of the origin of the word Kundalini (Sanskrit) are Kunta, Cunta and Kun all of which mean female genitalia, Shakti (Shiva’s consort), queen and Mother Earth — a distinct later degradation being ‘cunt.’

Original Story:  huffingtonpost.com

Many of you have expressed appreciation for this topic of spiritual sex and I’ll share one quote from an email: “So rare do you hear people talking about the *truth* of sex, the beautiful, deeper, connections that can be made that go so beyond physical contact . . .” Whatever level of sexuality you choose, that’s great, but I am choosing to write about the realms of sexuality beyond the pure physical act.

I thank you for responding and some comments have inspired me to choose the topic for this post. Even though spiritual sex is not synonymous with orgasms, there was considerable discussion about it; some comments even equated “spiritual sex” with “religion and orgasms.” To date, all I’ve said about the subject is that the Performance Model (our culture’s prevailing view of sex) has orgasm as its goal. Our culture is preoccupied with producing orgasms and sexual dysfunction is most distressing not only because of lowered self esteem but also because orgasms are negatively impacted (not having one at all, or not having it in the perceived “right way”). It’s a huge deal in my field of sex therapy and much has been said about the various dysfunctions, but there is a way to shift out of this paradigm altogether so that pleasure is possible whatever the functioning level. So I’d like to discuss something not well understood in culturally normative views of sex.

There is something I’ll call “conventional” orgasm, which may be what some of you are referencing as you write your comments. Neurochemically, orgasm releases the hormone oxytocin, which promotes good feelings and can lead to mutual comfort, safety, and caring, but not always. For example, if you have an orgasm with a casual encounter, it is unlikely to promote anything but a feeling of release with a strong desire to go home. Many times disconnected or addictive sex can lead to emotional irritability and intense feelings of malaise, self blame or even the blues.

Oxytocin breaks down quickly in the body, so the good feelings dissipate rapidly unless you choose to maintain the powerful relationship bonding that sex can offer. If you remember the exercise called Touching Hearts that I suggested in the second blog, (sadly, some people thought they’d feel silly trying it with their partners) there are great benefits from stimulating emotions that accompany open-heartedness such as appreciation, giving, caring, closeness. These emotions decrease our levels of cortisol, high levels of which are harmful, and increase our levels of the beneficial hormone, DHEA.

However, aside from genitally focused sex, with its relatively rapid release and let down after orgasm, there are two other levels (there are many, but I’m keeping it simple). These are:

Conscious Loving which is the enhancement of partner commitment through loving communion. It includes the experience of the “valley orgasm:” longer lasting and continuing waves of energy moving through the body. It is the heart level of sexuality.

Spiritual Union which is the ecstatic expanded experience producing altered states of consciousness. It encompasses the “cosmic orgasm:” the timeless, boundless state where orgasmic waves move through all the energy centers. Cosmic orgasm can and does occur spontaneously to anyone, but as a practice, it can replenish the life force with release through the crown of the head.

The truth is we are capable of experiencing orgasms in multiple dimensions. Energy centers, called chakras (meaning “spinning wheels” in Sanskrit) are not anatomical structures in the body but are clusters of oscillating energy. Chakras function like electrical transformers, lowering the vibrating rate of life force energy, called Prana in the Vedic system and enabling it to flow through the body. We are actually an organized combination of several energy systems around a unifying field. If we could see the subtle light bodies around us, we would look somewhat like a “luminous egg.” It is the electrical energy generated from the combined subtle systems in and around our bodies. When you received acupuncture, for example, the meridians being stimulated with needles are aspects of these subtle energy systems.

If you interested in reading more about this or even getting some training, some of the esoteric systems of spiritual sexuality available in the West are: Tantra, Kundalini Yoga, Quodoushka, Egyptian, Taoist and Toltec traditions to name a few. These traditions offer wisdom about sexuality that can balance us and benefit our health as well as heighten spiritual awareness. My own research into esoteric sexuality has focused on the Stone and Bronze Age Pre-patriarchal cultures, and my final blog before I go on vacation in early September will be on the ritual of the Sacred Marriage.

Original Story:  huffingtonpost.com

BILL O’REILLY, HOST: In the “Personal Story” segment tonight: Police in Covington, Kentucky, have charged 26-year-old Nicole Howell, who teaches English at Dayton High School, with having sex with a student. Ms. Howell says it never happened, that her life is on the verge of being ruined, and she wants to tell her story. So we are going to let her. Joining us from Cincinnati, Ohio, is Nicole Howell and her attorney, Eric Deters.

So, you knew this football player, the 16-year-old. And he was in one of your classes and you texted him? Is that what the initial problem — is that when it began?

Click here to watch the segment!

NICOLE HOWELL, TEACHER ACCUSED OF SEXUAL ABUSE: He was actually not a student of mine. He was a junior and my students that I taught were freshman and sophomore. And he actually took my phone while it was unattended and then sent me a text message, and I didn’t know who it was.

O’REILLY: Now was it a lurid text message? Offensive in any way?

HOWELL: No, it just said, “Hi, how are you?” And I said, “Who is this?” And he said, “You have to guess.” And I said well, I’m not going to. I’m in the middle of grading papers. And then he said well, you know, obviously he said his name. And I was like oh, OK, well, how are you? How is it going? But every text message that was between him and I was platonic.

O’REILLY: And how many text messages were there?

HOWELL: I would say maybe a handful. Nothing like serious conversations going back and forth. Just a hi, how are you? You know, are you staying out of trouble? You know, and that sort of thing.

O’REILLY: OK. Now do you text other students as well? Is that something that happens?

HOWELL: Yeah. In fact, I found that it was very good way to communicate with the students, bring myself down to their level so that, you know, I’m not that I was trying to befriend them in any way because I know that I was still, you know, their teacher, but it was very hard to connect with some of those students. And I found that sending them a text message or them being able to send one to me was a good way to be able to break the ice and let them feel safe to talk.

O’REILLY: All right. When did you learn, Ms. Howell, that there was an allegation against you of a sexual nature? When did you learn that?

HOWELL: I learned that on December 15, when my principal came to my classroom and walked me out of the building and I was suspended right there.

O’REILLY: Did you know what the accusation was and who it came from?

HOWELL: My superintendent had met with me and said that, you know, the student had come forward and said that the allegations, you know, he had made the allegations that it was, in fact, true that I had had sex with him. And that’s when they said they need to turn the matter over to the police.

ERIC DETERS, ATTORNEY FOR NICOLE HOWELL: Bill, he made the allegation and then he denied the allegation. When he found out he was going to get expelled, he remade the allegation. So he retracted it.

O’REILLY: All right. Now, anybody can make an allegation against anybody. I mean, you usually don’t get an indictment unless there’s backup evidence, counselor. What was the backup evidence?

DETERS: The backup evidence was merely — and we haven’t gotten the grand jury tapes yet — but the backup evidence was this boy’s word, who had made the statement, retracted it and remade it. That is only evidence that they have against this young lady.

O’REILLY: It seems like a grand jury — why wouldn’t they just indict it off that?

DETERS: Well, an indictment, as you know, Bill, for grand jury is a prosecutors there, there’s no defense attorney.

O’REILLY: No, I understand that, but usually grand juries require more than that. All right, so it’s in play. You’re arrested. You’re charged. The prosecutor says we’re going forward. A judge then says you try to get it thrown out, as any good attorney would, Mr. Deters. But the judge says no, we’re going to go ahead. And that just gives me pause. If it’s just one kid saying this and there’s no backup at all, this opens up a huge lawsuit potential for Ms. Howell if this thing falls apart.

DETERS: Absolutely. And this is very important. The allegations were that she gave alcohol, bought alcohol. Never happened. The allegation is he was in her house or apartment, had sex four times. Never happened. The allegation is that she did all of these things, phone calls. The phone records prove that they never had any phone contact.

O’REILLY: Yeah, it’s just very, very strange, because if what you’re saying is true, both of you, I mean, Nicole, I know your life must just be hell right now, you know, in that community and all of that.

HOWELL: Yeah.

O’REILLY: Everybody watching knows what you’re going through. And if you are innocent of this, and you’re found, I mean, you could come back for all kinds of things. I would think that the prosecution would cover itself. I’ll give you the last word, Ms. Howell. I’m sorry you have to go through this. I hope it’s not true. Say what you want.

HOWELL: I just want everyone to know that the reason I’m coming out finally and saying something is because I have an attorney who has given me the free reign to defend myself, as I should have from the very beginning. Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to do that until now. But I definitely want people to know that I’m completely innocent of this and they will see the truth.

DETERS: Bill, they gave her — she offered to take a lie detector test and they refused it.

O’REILLY: OK, keep us posted, Mr. Deters, on this and we will keep the audience across America.

DETERS: Thank you.

O’REILLY: And remember you are in this country innocent until proved guilty.

Original Story:  foxnews.com

1. Get stoked.
Sexy moments can strike when you least expect them. So seize the chance to spice up a night on the couch. “Have him use his fingertips to slowly, gently caress your skin,” suggests sex therapist Gloria Brame, Ph.D. “The light, sensual touch creates a tingling sensation that will wake up your body while also relaxing you for sex.”

2. Keep your panties on.
Back in high school, you probably had rules for how far you’d go: under the shirt, over the pants, and so on. Well, the teenage you was on to something. “It can be pleasurable torture to play with each other over your underwear, teasing and stroking through the fabric,” says sex coach Patti Britton, Ph.D. “You’re building up the anticipation, so when you finally do have skin-on-skin contact, it’ll be that much more explosive and exciting.”

3. Make circles.
Let’s be honest: Most guys are just grateful to be getting a blow job. But that’s no excuse to rest on your laurels. Rather than simply moving up and down, use your tongue to slowly wind around his member. “Swirl up the shaft with the tip of your tongue. When you’re at the top, slide your whole mouth down and then up, with a sucking motion,” suggests sex therapist Carole Altman, Ph.D., author of Don’t Have Sex Again Until You Read This Book.

4. Give barely-there kisses.
Rather than simply making a beeline for his below-the-belt region, create a slow burn with featherlight kisses. Start by kissing his eyelashes, then the corner of his mouth, his jaw, and his collarbone. Next, kiss his nipples, under his pecs, and down along his treasure trail and over to one hip bone, then the other. “You’re building up anticipation as you make that slow, seductive crawl,” says Altman. “And the randomness of your kisses keeps his nerves on high alert as his brain and body try to figure out where you’re going next.”

5. Bend it better.
For greater stimulation in missionary position, try this: “Hook your knees over your guy’s shoulders,” suggests Britton. “The angle puts more pressure on the clitoris, giving you a better chance of achieving orgasm.” Clench your butt and lift your pelvis to create more friction and make your climactic moment even more mind-blowing.

6. Get a little rough.
Give a jolt during sex by gently nipping your partner’s shoulders or earlobe. “When you’re in the heat of passion, you may go more into your head than your body,” explains Brame. “A little pain snaps you both back to the moment.”

7. Sit up tall.
You love you-on-top because you can control the speed, angle, and motion — he loves you-on-top because he can just lie back and watch. But what lazybones might not realize is that sitting up can enhance his pleasure even more. “Not only can you both do more with your arms and hands, but the sex is also more intimate with your torsos pressed together,” says Britton.

8. Guess what’s next.
A little unpredictability during sex can make the experience even more intense for you. “While in missionary, have him tease you by mixing up his movements: slipping in just a little, going in halfway, and thrusting deeply, in random order,” suggests Britton. It’s his call what sequence he moves in: two short strokes followed by a long one, three deep ones in a row followed by two quick teases…you get the point.

9. Show off.
Although your inner bad girl may get off on the idea of being caught in the act, the real you may not feel right about sneaking off to a bar bathroom. But you can feed any secret exhibitionist appetites by doing the deed in front of a window — with the lights out. “Stand up against the window, facing out, and have him take you from behind,” says Britton. You’ll get a rush from just the possibility of being watched.

10. Blow hot air.
No matter what position you’re in, you can enhance the experience by gently exhaling on each other’s skin. “You’re already feeling pleasure in your genitals, but this move adds soft, steamy heat to other sensitive areas like your neck, your nipples, or the inside of your wrists, giving you tingles from head to toe,” says Britton.

11. Find a new angle.
“In order to orgasm from oral sex, you need him to use consistent, steady strokes,” explains Britton. “The easiest way for him to do that is by licking up and down.” But you’re more likely to orgasm when his tongue is running across your clitoris. The solution: Have him situate himself perpendicular to you (in a “T” shape), lying on his side. He’ll be able to work his tongue more easily, at an angle that’s optimal for your pleasure.

12. Buzz away.
Put a spin on oral sex by getting a third party in on the action — a sex toy. “While he’s pleasuring you, have him lay a vibrating bullet against his cheek,” suggests Olivia St. Claire, author of 302 Advanced Techniques for Driving a Man Wild in Bed. “It creates a hum that’s not too intense, thanks to the buffering effect of his skin.” Of course, this move also works equally well when you do it for him, so be generous and give back.

13. Work your muscles.
You can put an extra-special twist on intercourse just by clenching your pubococcygeus muscle (the same muscle you use to stop and start the flow when you’re peeing). “As he enters you, squeeze the muscle tight around him and then let go as more of his length moves in,” says St. Claire. “Squeeze again as he pulls almost out. Then repeat with each thrust.” This creates a tight pressure around his penis, as though you’re massaging it. The benefit for you: Your clenching motion creates pleasurable tension in your G spot and clitoris, making orgasm easier to achieve — and more explosive.

14. Don’t take it all off.
Who doesn’t love getting naked? Still, there’s something so primal about clothes-on sex. While wearing a skirt or dress, get on the edge of the bed on your hands and knees. He unzips his pants, lifts your skirt, and has his way with you. “It’s a spontaneous, must-have-you-now move,” says Britton.

15. Anchor him.
Try this hands-on approach to increasing sensation for him during intercourse: Form a ring with two fingers and your thumb and gently hold down the skin at the base of his penis. “Pulling his loose skin taut brings the nerve endings closer to the surface, making him more sensitive,” explains St. Claire.

16. Get on your feet.
Here’s another way to make you-on-top more interesting: Squat over your man rather than straddling him. “By supporting yourself on your feet, you get better ease of motion,” explains St. Claire. “You can bounce higher and have more control of your movements, so your pleasure is intensified, and he can go in deeper, creating new sensations on the tip and around the base.”

17. Tighten up(or loosen up).
There are a million ways to adjust to achieve the perfect, er, fit. “If you want more friction during missionary, slide your legs together so that they’re between his,” suggests Brame. “You’ll have to start out with your legs flat on the bed, outside of his.” For deeper penetration, spread your legs wider with your knees up.

18. Give a tug.
When it comes to his below-the-belt area, you’re probably more focused on the star than the supporting players. But you can make sex a heightened experience for him by stroking his testicles. “Softly massaging the area increases blood flow to his pelvic region, increasing his arousal and sensitivity,” says Brame. “Then, as he’s about to orgasm, gently tug on the loose skin around the ‘boys’ to amplify his big finish.”

19. Grab hold.
Call him your prisoner of love and he’ll laugh. But pin him to the bed and he’ll know you mean business. “You can take a fun and playful approach to the whole domination thing by pinning his hands down while you’re on top,” says Brame. “It’s a delicious tease because all he wants to do is touch you, and you’re not allowing it.” Of course, if you’d prefer that he take control, just ask!

20. Go neck and neck.
You already know that your man’s neck is a sensitive spot — his little shivers and moans when you nibble at his throat should clue you in. Still, there are a few nooks that will elicit even more of a “yowza!” reaction. “The line that runs from behind his ear down to the crook where his neck meets his shoulder is especially sensitive,” says Britton. “You can lightly kiss other lesser-known hot spots as well, like along his jawbone and even the back of his neck.”

21. Tickle him.
He may think he’s seen every trick in the book, but show him you’re still full of surprises with this oral sex move: While down south, slip your finger into your mouth and stroke him. “The unexpected texture makes it a pleasurable treat for him,” explains St. Claire. The creativity alone will give him a rush since it’s something he’s probably never experienced before.

Original Story:  sfgate.com

Wannabe Latin lovers can improve their technique by playing with the erogenous zones of naked mannequins at a new interactive exhibition that has now opened in Berlin.

The “Amora sex academy” that opened in Berlin on Thursday welcomes visitors with the wry slogan, “Finally — an exhibition for those who always have to touch everything.”

More than 50 interactive displays guide visitors through the intimate areas of the male and female bodies, offering helpful tips on everything from striptease to oral sex and how to achieve a perfect orgasm.

“A lot of couples come in here together to learn something,” said Uta Barkow, the manager of the Beate Uhse sex chain which is hosting the academy. “It’s been very well received so far. A lot of exhibits have that ‘aha’ effect on a lot of people.”

The show features several life-sized plastic models, naked and in various positions. One female mannequin light ups when touched in the right spot. A voice shrieks “That’s it!” when the visitor manages to put his finger on the elusive G-spot.

Next to it is what the museum called its “Spank-o-meter.” It measures the level of pleasure a mannequin receives when spanked with a leather whip.

“So far we’ve had just as many women in here as men,” Barkow said. “Women coming in tend to have fewer inhibitions while the men tend to be a bit more embarassed.”

The museum also shows film clips of various sexual positions, including the “Italian chandelier” that the viewer learns can burn up to 920 calories per hour.

Founded by Frenchman Johan Rizki, the sex academy opened in London earlier this year and is also due to come to Barcelona.

Original Story: reuters.com

A teacher in California gave a copy of a DVD to her students to watch in their summer break without realizing it featured six seconds of her having sex.

The Isabelle Jackson Elementary School teacher in Elk Grove gave her 24 students the DVDs that were supposed to be a video of class memories.

Some of the pupils definitely saw something they’ll remember for a long time.

The video contained six seconds of her engaged in sex on a couch.

The school district has asked parents to destroy the DVDs.

The unidentified teacher has called parents herself to apologize for the surprising clip.

Original Story:  abc2news.com